I am in need.
Of what you may ask?
A change of scenery.
These walls whisper memories to me. Good and bad. Holding me in a constant loop that I can’t seem to get out of. With everything in it’s place, my house is like a movie set, ready to re-act the action that happened in it not so long ago. When I walk through my front door my soul shrieks as I look upon my furniture and belongings that I once loved – and now can’t stand.
I have a tendency to leave things behind. I move away from the bad, inhibiting things because I know what ultimate good it will bring… Some people believe I am simply ‘running from my problems’.
I’m not running. I’m not even quickly walking. In fact my transitions from an unhealthy place to a better place have always been slow, full of denial, and painful. But I always end up on the other side where the grass is greener… at least for a while.
So once again, I must pack up my things and move forward to better places. Yes I will miss my home. Yes I will miss the way my garden came to life around me. I’ll even miss being close to my memories. I’ll miss looking at my sofa and remembering all the things that happened there. But I know it’s time to let go and move forward. I need a change of scenery. I need to be somewhere different to feel different. Rearranging the furniture just won’t cut it.
So in two weeks I leave. Off to another place to make more memories and learn more lessons that I will cherish forever.