“I’m not sure,” My friend frowned as she looked down at her coffee – mixing in her second sugar.
“Not sure about what? You just said that he makes you happy,” I replied.
“Yeah but I’m not sure if he’s ‘the one’,” She looked up at me with genuine concern.
Something about this conversation didn’t sit right with me. I didn’t know exactly what bothered me about it, but something got my mind reeling.
‘The One’ I thought… Well this is all a bit pretentious.
But it was a genuine concern for my friend. She wasn’t even sure about dating this guy because she was worried that he might not be ‘The One’.
“I don’t want to waste my time or his,” She explained, “There’s no point in dating if he isn’t ‘The One’.”
I began to think. What load of bullshit had she been listening to?
Don’t get me wrong, I believe in finding love. I do believe that love is this beautifully catastrophic event reserved for two people whose chemistry erupts… They either come out on top as survivors or crumble in its chemical reaction. But is there really ‘The One’ for everyone?
When I was 12 I thought my first crush was ‘The One’. Everything inside me told me so. I was so sure that there wasn’t another thing in life I was more sure about… The (sometimes obsessive) love was real to me. At the time I was sure I was in love and he was the only one in the entire universe I could ever love.
But he didn’t love me. In fact, he was probably scared of me. But the fact was that I was so adamant that he would be ‘The One’ and we would spend our lives together.
As you might have guessed – that was not how it worked out. He ended up politely asking me to never talk to him again and to stay away from his house… But I did not give up. Because then, two years later, I thought I had hit pot luck and found ‘The One’ again. This time this guy actually did like me. But as time passed, we crumbled.
Even Romeo thought he was in love with Rosaline before he met Juliette. He was adamant that Rosaline was ‘The One’ for him… so I guess even Romeo got it wrong at first.
If you’re willing – share your experiences with finding ‘The One’.